Isisombululo kukunciphisa nje ukuzonda kwethu ngokuthi siqale sazi, emva koko sifunde indlela yokuyibumba kwaye siyibumbe kwaye siyilawule.(Ifoto: Alvin Mahmudov / Unsplash) Ndiyazi ukuba ucinga ntoni. Ubonile isihloko kwaye wazithethela, ucinga ukuba ngubani lo mfo? Ndizithiyile? Ngaba uyazi ukuba ndimhle kangakanani? Ngaba unayo Ndibonile inwele zam ezirhuqayo ezintsha? Ngaba uyazi ukuba ndakhe ndaqeqeshwa isiqingatha semarathon kwaye ngenene ndabaleka inxenye yayo? Ndithandana ngokupheleleyo nam. Yintoni le ayaziyo?
Jonga, ndiyavuma, iinwele zakho zihle kakhulu. Kodwa masibe yinyani apha. Ukuba sinyanisekile ngokwenene kwiziqu zethu, sonke sinezinto ezimbalwa zokuzicekisa eziqhubeka amaxesha ngamaxesha. Kulungile, mhlawumbi uninzi lokuzicekisa kuqhubeka, kuxhomekeke kwinqanaba lokuhlukumezeka olwenzileyo, kwaye zingaphi iziqendu Iifayili wenziwa phantsi komntwana.
Kodwa nazi iindaba ezimnandi, ukuzithiba kuyinxalenye nje yemeko yomntu. Akukho nto iphosakeleyo ngokwemvelo kuwe ngenxa yokuba ungathandi kakhulu okanye uzive uneentloni ngemiba ethile engathandekiyo yesiqu sakho. Wonke umntu uyayenza. Nokuba u-Oprah kufuneka azithiye ngamanye amaxesha, ndiqinisekile. Kwaye andikho ngaphandle, kunjalo. Emva koko, ndibhalela i-listicle yewebhusayithi-mna kufuneka Ndithiyile ikona yam enzulu, emnyama.
Sonke sinayo amaphupha siye sahluleka ukuwafezekisa , Iinjongo sisilele ukuzibandakanya, iintshukumo esinqwenela ukuba besinazo okanye singazenzanga, iindlela apho sinqwenela ukuba sahluke. Oku kuqhelekile. Kwaye sonke kufuneka sijongane nala malungu wethu esingawathandi ncam. Abanye bethu bajongana nayo ngokuphepha-silala ebomini, singaze senze nto izigqibo ezinzulu , Ukulandela abanye, kunye ukunqanda yonke imisebenzi enzima okanye ukungqubana. Abanye bethu bajongana nayo ngokuzibamba ngesondo okanye ngezinto okanye ukuthanda kakhulu okanye ukuphazamisa. Abanye bazama ukuhlawula ngaphezulu ngokuzama ukusindisa umhlaba kwaye bazise i-utopia kwaye mhlawumbi baqale enye iMfazwe yeHlabathi kwinkqubo.
Injongo apha ayikokususa oko kuzicekisa. Ekuphela kwendlela yokwenza oko kukususa izazela zethu kunye / okanye sibe zii-psychopaths. Kwaye asiyifuni loo nto.
Andikukhuthazi ukucinezela ukuzicekisa kwakho, kungenjalo ungaphela ukudubula iklabhu yasebusuku eOrlando .
Hayi, isisombululo kukunciphisa nje ukuzonda kwethu ngokuthi siqale sazi, emva koko sifunde indlela yokuyibumba kwaye siyibumbe kwaye siyilawule. Injongo apha kukulawula ukuphoxeka kwethu, ukuze bangagqityi ukusilawula.
Kungenxa yoko le nto eli nqaku libizwa ngokuba Ungazicaphukela Njani Ngaphantsi, hayi Indlela Yokuyeka Ukuzithiya Ngonaphakade naphakade kwaye ube liQhwa leKhephu eliFucking likaThixo. Akukho qhwa ligqibeleleyo. Bendihlala eBoston, ndibone amakhekheba ekhephu amaninzi. Akukho namnye kubo ogqibeleleyo. Kwaye nokuba bekukho, ndiqinisekile ubungayi kuba yiyo .
Ke, masiqhubeke nayo. Nanga amanyathelo alithoba okuzithiya kancinci kwaye ufunde indlela yokulawula ukuzicekisa kwakho ngcono ukuze ungaguquki ube kukudakumba kwendoda okanye, okubi nangakumbi, i-nutcase yenkolo obaleka ejikeleza nemiqondiso ethi UTHIXO WAYITHIYA IIMPAHLA kuyo.
Inyathelo 1: Funda ukuba ungathi hayi. Okukhona uzithiyile, kokukhona uya kuzama ukukholisa kwaye uchukumise abanye abantu abakungqongileyo ngalo lonke ixesha. Emva kwayo yonke loo nto, ukuba uyakholelwa emfihlakalweni ukuba uyinto ebolileyo, emva koko uyakukujonga ngaphezulu oko abanye abantu bakucinga ngawe, kwaye ngokungazi uya kuzinikezela kuyo yonke imizamo yakho yokubaphatha bacinge ukuba awunguye Umntu ombi ukholelwa ngokufihlakeleyo ukuba unguye.
Igama elithi ewe lifumana uhanahaniso oluninzi kwezi ntsuku, kodwa ndifuna ukubuyisa amandla okuthi hayi.
Ukuthi hayi kuhle kakhulu xa usazi ukuba uza kuyithetha nini kwaye kanjani ngokufanelekileyo. Uthi hayi ekwenzeni iqela le I-shit engenantsingiselo ongacingi ukuba kubalulekile ebomini. Uthi hayi ebantwini bagqithe kwimida yabo kwaye wenze iimfuno ezingafanelekanga zexesha lakho okanye ingqalelo. Uthi hayi uyenze icace kwabanye ukuba umi phi kwaye uzokuthini / uza kuba yintoni nyamezela kubudlelwane bakho . Hayi kuhle.
Ukutsho ezi nos kunzima, kunjalo. Kungenxa yokuba ukukwazi ukuthi akukho mpilo usempilweni kufuna inqanaba elithile lokuzihlonipha nokuzikhathalela. Kodwa ukuthi hayi ebantwini kunye nezinto ezenzakalisa ubomi bakho kunoncedo kuhlala linyathelo lokuqala lokufunda ukuthanda nokuzikhathalela.
Owu, kwaye ewe, ufunda ukuthi hayi nakuwe, ukuze uziqeqeshe kwaye uzigcine ujongile, uzikhumbuze ukuba awazi yonke into okanye uyazi yintoni le uyithethayo okanye uyenzayo isiqingatha sexesha. Obu bubuchule obungaphantsi komgangatho, kodwa kubonakala ngathi kulahlekile kwezi ntsuku kwi ndinike yonke into ubudala.
Owu, kwaye ngelixa sisithi hayi kuthi….
Inyathelo 2: Yeka ukuphulula amalungu esini ngalo lonke ixesha lokuhamba. Hayi, andithethi ukuba uyeke ukuzikhathaza ngamalungu akho akhethekileyo. Nangona kunjalo, ukuba wenza njalo njengamaxesha ali-15 ngosuku, unokufuna ukunciphisa loo nto kanye.
Into endiyithethayo kukuphulula amalungu esini ngendlela engokomfuziselo — zonke ezo zinto uzenza uyolo, uzonwabise rhoqo. Nokuba kunjalo ukutya iidessert ezili-11 , okanye ukuhlala kude kube yi-4 kusasa uzama ukungenelela iligi yabadala abaphumelele , okanye uxoka kubahlobo bakho kwaye ubaxelele ukuba uyibethile le blonde ishushu ngoMgqibelo ophelileyo xa inene, unxile nje kangangokuba udlule kwisikhundla sokugqibela kwimoto yakho. 
Kulumkele ukuzonwabisa okungabalulekanga.(Ifoto: cc_photoshare / Flickr)
Zonke ezi zinto zincinci, azibalulekanga. Kwaye kunzima kule mihla. Hayi, hayi iqhude lakho-ukuxhathisa ukunika kuzo kunzima. Kuba baziva bonwabile. Umzuzwana. Kodwa ukungabinantsingiselo kwabo ekugqibeleni kuya kukutya.
Kukho esi sahluko singaqhelekanga ngokwenene eNapoleon Hill's Cinga kwaye ukhule Apho athetha khona malunga nendlela uThomas Edison alile ngayo ukwabelana ngesondo okanye enye into kwaye yindlela awayeze ngayo patent 10,000. Andazi, yayivakala incinci kakhulu, kodwa umbono yayikukuba isini sikhupha amandla anokujoliswa ngakumbi iinzame ezinemveliso neziluncedo .
Andizukuya kude kangako, njengoko ndithanda ukupholisha iqhina elidala kakhulu njengomfo olandelayo. Kodwa ndicinga ukuba isifundo sokwenyani apha kukufunda indlela yokuzilawula ngokwakho. Kwakhona, kubuyela ekwazini ukuba ungathi nini kuwe. Yenza la ma-indulgences abe yitsheri kwikhekhe lakho lobomi. Ayisiyo ikhekhe ngokwayo.
(Hayi, ngekhe uyitye ikhekhe .)
Inyathelo 3: Yiveze intiyo. Ngokwesiqhelo izinto ozithiyileyo ngawe zezi zinto uzenzayo zifihle kwihlabathi liphela . Zizinto okholelwa ukuba ziya kubangela ukuba abantu bakugatye kwaye bakwenzakalise, bakukhombe kwaye bahlekise ngawe.
Kodwa olu loyiko kuhlala kungekho sizathu. Kuba amaxesha amaninzi izinto esizithiyileyo ngathi zifana nazo wonke umntu azithiyileyo ngaye. Kufana nomdlalo we-poker apho wonke umntu ecinga ukuba unesandla esibi kakhulu kwaye esoyika ukudlala kuba uqinisekile ukuba uya kuphulukana, ke wonke umntu ufihla amakhadi abo kuba baneentloni.
Isimanga apha kukuba uthando luhlala lufezekiswa ngokufumana umntu o-sexy owamkela aze athande ezo zinto zinzulu, nezimnyama kuwe, kwaye uyawola kwaye udumise ezona nzulu, nezona zimnyama kuzo. Into endiyithethayo yile, ufanele yabelana ngala shit ukuze uyiphilise, nyana.
Ukuvula ezona zinto zibi kuthi, nokuzamkela nokwabelana ngazo, kuzisa eyona ntembeko kunye nolwalamano olusenyongweni.
Oko kukuthi, ewe, ucinga ukuba uzimisele kwaye / okanye uyakwazi ukuxolela abantu kunye / okanye wena.
Inyathelo 4: Xola abantu, kubandakanya nawe. Uxolelo lufumana ixesha elininzi lomoya, kodwa kwinkcubeko njengesohlwayo njenge-US, ayiziva ngathi baninzi abantu, uyazi, bayayenza.
Ukuxolela kuthetha ukuba uyayiqonda into efunxa kwaye usamthanda umntu (okanye wena) ngaphandle kwayo.
Uyenza njani loo nto, ngokuchanekileyo? Qaphela iinjongo ezintle okanye ubuncinci ukungazi emva kwezenzo ezimbi / ezimbi / ezingathandekiyo. Umzekelo, uninzi lwabantu alwenzi izinto ezimbi ngenxa yokuba zinobubi, ziyenza kuba zingazi ngcono okanye zona ngokungafanelekanga bakholelwa ukuba bayazigwebela . Rhoqo kuyanceda ukukhumbula ukusilela kwakho kunye nokungazi xa uxolela omnye umntu ngenxa yabo.
Yiyo ke le nto ukujongana nokuzithiya kubaluleke kakhulu-kokukhona ungaziboniyo kwaye uzamkele iinxalenye zakho ongazithandiyo, kokukhona uya kukwazi ukuxolela kwaye uyeke iimpazamo zabanye. Kwaye okungakumbi komsindo, isigwebo sokugweba uya kuba.
Inyathelo 5: Thatha kancinci. Ngokukrakra, ujongeka udiniwe.
Inyathelo 6: Vumela ungaphumeleli. Ukuzithanda kwakho akuhambelani nendlela oziva ngayo ngempumelelo yakho; ukuthanda kwakho yindlela oziva ngayo ukusilela kwakho . Umntu ozithandayo kwaye uzikhathalele akanaso isidingo esingummangaliso sokwenza yonke into ngokufanelekileyo okanye ukugqibelela okanye ukulungisa okokuqala.
Ngokuchasene noko, bakulungele ngakumbi ukungcola nokumosha ngenxa yokuba bayaqonda ukuba kulapho ukukhula kunye nenkqubela yokwenene ivela khona.
Inyathelo 7: Phumeza awona maphupha akho amabi-ube sisityebi, lawula intsimi yakho, ufumane uthando lobomi bakho-qaphela ukuba ayizisi yonke intsingiselo kunye nokuzaliseka ocinga ukuba kuya kuba njalo, ube nengxaki ekhoyo kunye nokuwohloka okusondeleyo njengoko ubona yintoni isihogo sobomi bakho, phinda uzinikezele kwinkonzo elula yabanye kunye neziyolo ezilula ngokwakho.
Ngaphandle kokuphulula amalungu esini, kunjalo.
Inyathelo 8: Zombini izinto ezintle nezintle ozithethayo zi-bulshit, ke yeka ukuzibandakanya kuyo. Nantsi into enkulu yokutshintsha ubomi kum: ndiqonda ukuba zonke izinto ezimbi nezimbi ezo ndizithethileyo ngam zazingeyonyani, zonke izinto ezimangalisayo, ezimbi zeesile endizixelele zona ngam zazingeyonyani ngokunjalo. Inyani yile, awuyazi ngokwenene into eyinyani malunga nawe okanye indlela olilinganisa ngayo ihlabathi. Inyani yile, ingqondo yakho iyasondela kwaye iyayisebenzisa ayinakuthenjwa . Inyani yile, nguwe ayizizo ezizodwa , kwaye mhlawumbi yinto entle leyo. Ukwenza izinto ezizodwa kudala ulindelo olungekho ngqiqweni, kwaye ukulindelwa ngokungekho ngqiqweni kudala iintlobo ezizodwa zokuzicekisa.
Inyathelo 9: Thatha eyona njongo ibalulekileyo okanye ukusilela ebomini bakho kwaye uye kubuza umntwana oneminyaka emi-4 ukuba bacinga ntoni ngayo. Banokugigitheka kwaye bakucele ukuba wenze ngathi ungumthi kwaye udlale nabo. Kwaye impendulo yabo iya kuba ifanelekile kwaye ichanekile .
Kungenxa yokuba nokuba uzama ukunyanga umhlaza, fumana amandla ebandayo fusion, okanye uwenze ibar xa kuvulwa ukuphinda uqalise ukuhla kwemihla yokusela, usengumntu, kwaye usenakho ukudibanisa kwaye uvelane kwaye dlala nge ubomi obunikwe wena . Kwaye abantwana abaneminyaka emi-4 banesakhono esimangalisayo sokukukhumbuza ngaloo nto. 
USindi akakuniki ikamva malunga nezicwangciso zakho zobomi.(Ifoto: UDustin noJennifer Stacey / Flickr)
Ndiyaqikelela ukuba ndifumana ntoni ngawo onke la manyathelo kukuphuhlisa ukuziqhelanisa okusempilweni kokuthobeka.
Ewe, ukuthobeka. Kukangaphi sisiva eso sigama siphoswa kule mihla?
Kuba eyona nto ixhaphakileyo kuyo yonke inzondo yimvakalelo ephelelwe lixesha- unokucinga yonke into ngobomi bakho yile eyona nto imbi kakhulu , okanye yonke into oyenzayo kufuneka ibe ngu eyona nto intle ukwenzela ukubuyekeza. Kwaye akukho nanye kwezi zingasentla ziyinyani. UCindy, oneminyaka emi-4 ubudala, uyayifumana loo nto. Yiyo loo nto ekucele ukuba ube ngumthi. Kodwa endaweni yoko ufihla iflask yakho kwaye uzama ukumcacisela ukuba uza kusombulula njani ubushushu behlabathi ngasemva kwe-napkin. Kodwa vala nje umzuzu ube ngumthi.
UMark Manson ngumbhali, ibhlog kunye nosomashishini obhalayo markmanson.net .
