Umzekeliso kaFred Harper. Inkosikazi uAstrid yayifuna ikhabethe. Wayeqala i-gig entsha kwigrafikhi yoyilo lwegraphic, kwaye eswele isinxibo sobungcali. Ke wenza oko wayehlala ekwenza xa efuna imali ekhawulezileyo: Wathumela i-imeyile kuRalph, enye yezityebi ezihlawula ihagu ezazimnceda, zinika impahla yakhe, izihlangu, izixhobo, ukutya, iiholide zodidi-nantoni na ayifunayo.
Ekuphela kwento ekufuneka eyenzile yayikukumphatha gadalala. Ungamxokeleli okanye umkhokele nge-leash eqhotyoshelwe kwiibhola zakhe. Ungamdanisi. Nditsho nokudibana nomntu. Mkhumbuze nje, kwakhona, nge-imeyile, ukuba wayeyintoni isiqwenga somdaka.
Kwafuneka ndiyicacise into yokuba ebengakulungelanga ukuba lapho kwam, utshilo u-Astrid, obomvu obhalwe umvambo kwi-30 yakhe yokuqala, ohlala kwaye esebenza kwi-Lower East Side. Kuloluzuko, wamnika ukufikelela kwikhadi letyala, wamhlawulela izixhobo zakhe kunye nerente, wamnika nemali eyongezelelweyo xa eyifuna. Ndizuze abahlanu abazukileyo, abayi-10 abazukulwana, ndenzela nje ukuba ndithi 'Ndiyayifuna, akukho mibuzo ibuziweyo, kukugezela,' utsho ngokuzingca.
Umsebenzi omhle ukuba ungayifumana.
I-Astrid yi-dominatrix yezemali, okanye i-Fin Dom, ethi ifumana phakathi kwe- $ 50,000 ukuya kwi-70,000 yeedola ngonyaka ngamadoda abetha ngokwasemoyeni-kwaye ingaphezulu komsebenzi wakhe wosuku. Ngoku ukuba uqoqosho luyenyuka, kunjalo nangorhwebo lwakhe.
Ngokungafaniyo nobudlelwane bendabuko be-BDSM, ulawulo lwezezimali alufane lubandakanye iintlungu zomzimba okanye isondo, nangona abathengi ngamanye amaxesha bezokuzonwabisa kubukho benkosikazi-ukuba uyabanika oko
ilungelo. Endaweni yesabhokhwe kunye neetyathanga, iFin Dom ibeka isixhobo esinamandla ngakumbi: Ilizwi layo. Unokulihlazisa, alikhohlise, alikhohlise okanye alikhohlise ikhoboka lakhe lezemali.
I-blackmail evumayo iyinxalenye yokutsala, njengokuyeka ulawulo. |
Isitshixo kukuba nakho ukukhetha umntu olungileyo ngexesha elifanelekileyo kwaye baqiniseke ukuba bafumana okuthile kuyo, utshilo u-Mistress Dee, u-dominatrix osekupheleni kweminyaka ye-20 ofana ne-buxom Betty Rubble. Kukho umahluko phakathi kwam othi 'Hei, ndifuna iibhutsi ezintsha,' kwaye 'Heyi, ndifuna iibhutsi ezintsha kuba uBull wam uyeza edolophini kwaye ufuna ukundibulala ndibolile.'
Ubudlelwane obuninzi buyinyani, buqhutywa ngeSkype, ikhamera yewebhu, i-imeyile, isicatshulwa okanye ifowuni nje eqhelekileyo. Ezinye iiFin Doms zibhengeza kwi-Intanethi (kwiiwebhusayithi ezinje fumoku.com , luhlobo lwe-Linkedin lwenkcubeko, okanye finkiingcangcangco.com , obuza umbuzo ohehayo, Ngaba ingcinga yokunikezela ngemali yakho kubafazi abakrelekrele nabanomtsalane iyakuguqula?). Uninzi lweedoms zamkela amakhadi etyala, i-PayPal, amakhadi ezipho eAmazon, kwaye kunjalo, nemali. Kwiingcali ezininzi, sisiqwenga nje esinye solawulo lwabo olupheleleyo.
Amashumi alithoba anesihlanu eepesenti amadoda andiqhakamshelayo akanamdla kwezokwabelana ngesondo-ixesha-nam, utshilo uDee, okhe waba kwindawo ye-S & M malunga neminyaka emithandathu apha naphesheya; Ubukhoboka bezezimali kunye nokukhuselwa kwenkuku ziphakathi kwezinto zakhe ezizodwa. Iwebhusayithi yakhe iyaqhayisa, phakathi kwezinye izinto, uluhlu lwezinto ezinqwenelekayo zabathengi ukuba bazithenge: Iibhegi zePrada, izikhonkwane zeLouis Vuitton, amatikiti emidlalo yeqonga, kunye nokutshintsha kwesondo, kunye neeyunifomu zomkhosi. Uqikelela ukuba isiqingatha sabathengi bakhe zizikhundla eziphezulu: Abaphathi beBigwig, oonondaba beendaba, oonobhanki, amagqwetha — abantu abalahlekileyo kakhulu. Esenokuba sesona sizathu sokuba bayonwabele.
Le ayisiyiyo Iimpawu ezingama-50 . UChristian Grey kunye no-Anastasia Steele onamehlo abanzi azibandakanya ngqo kwi-BDSM. Ewe, uthenga izipho zakhe ezintle, kodwa ayisiyiyo eyona nto iphambili ekuthobeleni kwakhe. (Ngaphandle koko, ungusozigidigidi. Uye wagqobhoza iqokobhe elingcono kuye.) Nangona ulawulo lwezemali luyinxalenye yolwalamano, uGrey udlala ngokutshintshiselana ngamandla (TPE), apho iqabane eliphambili lilawula ukuzithoba konke konke. amaxesha.
Inkalo yezemali yenye yeendlela zokulawula, kodwa iGrey ayisebenzisi kangako njengenye yezixhobo zakhe njengezinye izinto ngaphakathi kweBDSM, ucacisa uMistress Dee, fan wencwadi. Ekugqibeleni ibali elithandanayo malunga nendoda efuna ukulawula nokuphucula ibhinqa eliyithandayo eyenzeka nokuba yi-billionaire. Kum, intle loo nto — ngakumbi okokugqibela.
KwiFin Dom, ewe, ezothando azizizo izizathu zokuseka ivenkile. Endaweni yoko, hlazisa i-bugger engathandekiyo kwaye uphile ube mkhulu. Phambi kokuba inkosikazi ibe nokuthathela ingqalelo ukuthatha umthengi omtsha, enyanisweni, ifuna umrhumo wemali ukumisela ukuba ulifanele ixesha lakhe.
Ngaba kunokuba nzima kangakanani? Ngokwenene kunzima kakhulu kunokuba umntu enokucinga. Idomain ezinikeleyo ichitha iminyaka icokisa ubugcisa bayo kwaye kufuneka ibe nokuqonda-bayazibandakanya kwindima ebalulekileyo, emva kwayo yonke loo nto. Ngokukodwa, iFin Dom kufuneka ifunde ukuzibamba, oko kukuthi, ukuqonda into eyenza ukuba umthengi wakhe agxadazele ngaphandle kokuya ngaphezulu. Kuya kufuneka afunde iingxaki zengqondo zomthengi wakhe, emva koko amsebenzise ngendlela efanelekileyo (ukudlwengulwa kwesipaji, ngentetho).
Kuya kufuneka kwakhona afumane ukuthembela kwabathengi. Kwimeko efanelekileyo, uFin Dom uza kuwazi umvuzo wakhe wonyaka, uchitha malini, kwaye uchitha phi. Usenokumenzela uhlahlo-lwabiwo mali aze afune ukuba acele imvume yokusebenzisa imali yakhe — oyena mphathi wemali. Zininzi iindlela ezahlukeneyo zokuphindaphinda, uyaphawula uDee. Xa isebenza kakuhle ngendlela esempilweni, i-dom iyakhathala ngendoda ethatha imali kuyo kwaye iyenze ngendlela enoxanduva. Sisenzo sothando ngokugqibeleleyo.
Kuyadinisa nako. Njengakwi-buzzword dujour, unxibelelwano kufuneka luchaneke, kunye neFin Dom igcina umfanekiso wokuphakama ngawo onke amaxesha. Ukuba uvumela imaski ukuba ilahle, imeko ilahle isibheno. Oko kuthatha amandla amaninzi engqondo, omzimba kunye neemvakalelo, hayi ukujonga nje indawo kodwa nokwenza indima, utshilo uDee. Sisenzo sobubele.
UDamien Rosenfeld, osebenzisa Igama lemfazwe Yipansexual, bi-yonxweme yeFin Dom. Ucacisa ukuba umsebenzi wakhe ufuna ukucinga kakhulu kunye nokucwangciswa.
Ndithetha ngayo yonke into ngaphambili. Ziziphi izinto onomdla kuzo? Zithini iintsilelo zakho? Utshilo uMnu. Rosenfeld, 31, onenwele ezinombala wobusi obude egxalabeni kunye nefom ecekeceke, angangumntwana weentyatyambo o-androgynous, i-erotic sprite.
Kuya kufuneka udlale ngeemvakalelo zomfo, ukuze umnike okuphezulu akufunayo, utsho. Ukucela nje imali okanye iithoyi akuyi kuyinqumla. Kuya kufuneka uhambise umgca wepunch ngexesha elifanelekileyo ukuze umntu azive evuliwe sisithuko. Kuya kufuneka wazi amaqhosha abo kwaye ucofe phi. 
U-Mistress Dee ungene kwi (Ifoto: Emily Assiran / New York Braganca).
Umnumzana Rosenfeld, imbongi yexeshana kunye nomlingisi we-porn osandula ukubuyisa umkhuba wakhe wokulandela amanye amashishini, ungene kwihlabathi kwi-20 yakhe yokuqala nale ntombazana yayiyintombi yakhe ngoko. Benza malunga ne-30,000 yeedola ngonyaka, okwethutyana. Amadoda abawabonayo ahlala phakathi kweminyaka engama-40 nama-60, abantu bahlala benamandla-kunye neentsapho. Babethe tye, bacaphule ngaphandle kokucaphula, utshilo uMnu Rosenfeld, ofumene abathengi kwiCraigslist nakwiRentboy.com.
Ngokulawula ngokwasemzimbeni kukho amagama akhuselekileyo, kodwa ngokuthotywa kwezemali, izinto zibonakalisa ukungangqinelani xa ii-barbs zisebenza njengezixhobo
Ndineenkwenkwe ezininzi zeHassidic, utsho. Abanye bafuna ukuthotywa isidima ngokuba ngamaJuda. Abanye abayi kuyinyamezela, baya kuhamba baphume. Abanye bafuna ukuxelelwa ukuba bayinto etyebileyo ye-shit, i-parasite. Kukho ulungelelwaniso olungileyo lokutyhala imida.
Ingenza ntoni into yokuba umntu abeke umntu angamazi ukuba uphethe isipaji sakhe kunzima ukusiqonda, ngakumbi kuthi bethu abasokolayo ukuhlawula irenti yethu inyanga nenyanga, singasathethi ke eyomnye umntu. Kodwa yile nto kanye isibheno. Uninzi lwala madoda (kwaye uninzi lwabathengi ngamadoda) bayakonwabela ukuhlala emaphethelweni. Bayathanda ukuzincama ngokwasemalini (nangona uninzi lunengeniso yokulahla, ke imibingelelo ayinkulu kakhulu); Ukugculelwa kwemvume kuyinxalenye yomtsalane, njengokuyeka ulawulo.
Uninzi lwala madoda lukwindawo yamandla emini kwaye lifuna nje ithuba lokungabi namandla, apho angenagunya okanye kulawulo, utshilo uJonathan Alpert, ugqirha wezengqondo waseNew York onabaxhasi abakhulu beWall Street. Yindlela yokuba baphume kweso sigqibo-kwimowudi eyintloko baye kwelinye lokungena.
Abantu abahlukeneyo bafumana ukuphakama ngeendlela ezahlukeneyo, utshilo uBrandon Wade, umseki kunye ne-CEO ye yingxonang , oqikelela ukuba malunga neepesenti ezintlanu zababhalisi besiza abamalunga nezigidi ezi-4 bajonge ubudlelwane beFin Dom. Abanye abantu bayakufezekisa oko ngokuntywila esibhakabhakeni okanye ngokutsiba eweni kwibhodi ekhephu. Kwamanye amadoda aphulukana nolawulo ngokuthukwa kunye nokusetyenziswa yindlela yolo khuphiswano lwe-adrenaline.
UDennis, oneminyaka engama-38 ubudala, owacela ukusebenzisa i-alias, ngunjingalwazi wefilosofi. (Phakathi kwezifundo zakhe: Ingcinga, imigaqo yokuziphatha, kunye ... nefilosofi yabasetyhini. Ngokwenyani.) Ulandela umkhondo wakhe we-BDSM ukuya kufikisa, xa wayeqala ukuba neemvakalelo zesondo. Ukuhlaziswa ngamantombazana kwamvusa.
Kumabanga aphakamileyo, umzekelo, wayehlala ehamba nentombi yakhe ekhaya evela esikolweni. Kodwa endaweni yokuncika kokwanga kokuqala, ndacela ukuba ndingaguqa ngamadolo ndimqubude, ukhumbula ngomnxeba.
Ungene kulo okwethutyana, waze wayiguqula yaba ngumbono ngokubukela umntakwabo omncinci, kodwa ekugqibeleni wakruquka wadlulela kwamanye amakhwenkwe awayenolunya ngokwasemzimbeni nangokwesondo.
Phakathi kwiminyaka yama-90, wakhubeka kwiFin Dom enomtsalane egama linguPrincess Sierra (iphepha lakhe leAmazon elinamaphepha amahlanu Uluhlu lweminqweno ngoku kubandakanya: Intombazana enguvulindlela: I-Annotated Autobiography nguLaura Ingalls Wilder ($ 24.89); I-Lowensenf Mustard, eshushu ngakumbi ($ 8.80); eluhlaza okomnquma phantsi kweZambatho zeCleopatra Jacket ($ 209.99); kunye neMacbook Pro ($ 2,249.99).
Ulandele iwebhusayithi yeSierra ( ezemali.com/journal ) ngokusondeleyo, kodwa ngelo xesha wayengumfundi wekholeji ohluphekileyo kwaye wayengenayo indlela yokuhlola iminqweno yakhe ngaphaya kokuthenga iziselo zamantombazana. Nje ukuba abe nemali engaphezulu, wayisukela.
Kuye, isibheno solawulo lwezezimali kukuba yeyona ndlela yokwenyani kunye nokutshintshiselana ngamandla. Indima yokudlala ye-BDSM ngezabhokhwe, imixokelelwane, ubukhoboka yinto enye, kodwa ekupheleni kosuku leyo yimidlalo nje, egxile kufantasy yamadoda, utshilo. Kodwa ukunikezela ngemali oyisebenzele nzima kumfazi omhle ngelixa unqatshelwe nayiphi na into enokubuyisela ngokwesondo kunye / okanye yothando imalunga nokwenyani njengokufumana kwabasetyhini.
Okanye jonga ngale ndlela: Ngaba ukhetha ukubetha umfana kwaye umbize ngamagama angcolileyo, okanye uye kwindawo yokuthenga? (Xa uyibeka ngoluhlobo…) 
Umntu onesiphiwo uFin Dom kufuneka azi ukuba umtyhala kangakanani umthengi wakhe. (Ifoto: Emily Assiran / New York Braganca)
Ngokwesiqhelo, yena kunye neempazamo zakhe bazibandakanya nakwenye yeziganeko zintathu: Umhla womsebenzi, apho aya kumhlawula khona ukuze amvumele acoce imoto okanye indlu yakhe, amhlambele iimpahla, okanye akhuhle imigangatho yakhe. Umhla wokuthenga, apho athenga khona iimpahla zakhe kwaye wafaka iingxowa zakhe. Okanye umhla wokuthotywa, njengexesha ahlawule ngalo intombazana ukuba imyeke ahlambe imoto yakhe ngelixa yayikhonkotha imiyalelo phambi kwamangqina aliqela.
Ndiyayithanda xa umntu obhinqileyo egqobhoza iiodolo zakhe ngokubhekisa kum njenge'bitch, 'utsho. Ndifumana ukonwaba ngokweemvakalelo nangokwesondo xa umntu obhinqileyo ophambili endikukhonza njengamava okukhawulezisa amandla kunye nokonyusa amandla okuhamba nokuba nelakho ikhoboka elithobelayo. Ngokubanzi, ukhetha i-Fin Doms phakathi kwe-18 kunye ne-27, abafazi ababhinqileyo abathenga ezivenkileni ezinje ngeLululemon, abasetyhini abanobuso obuhle, obukhangeleka bumsulwa kunye namehlo aqaqambileyo afihla abantu ababawayo, abakhohlakeleyo kunye nabathandanayo.
UDennis, ngoku okhonza ibhinqa elinye kuphela, unyanzelisa ukuba ukuzixabisa kwakhe kuhlale kufanelekile, kwaye akanawo amanxeba asezingqondweni. Abazali bakhe bebendawonye, ngothando, amashumi amane eminyaka; Akakhumbuli nakuphi na ukwenzakala okubalulekileyo ukusuka ebutsheni bakhe. Inkcazo evakalayo, ucebisa ukuba, yindaleko. Kuyavakala ukucinga ukuba amadoda anomnqweno wokubonelela ngamabhinqa akwizinga eliphezulu, ngaphandle kokufuna ukuba yedwa ngokwesondo, aya kuthi, kwezinye iimeko, akhethwe ngokwemvelo, utshilo. Njengeqabane, indoda enjalo ivumela iqabane layo ukuba lifikelele kwiintlobo ezahlukeneyo kunye nomgangatho wemfuza, ngelixa isebenza nzima ukubonelela ngezixhobo eziyimfuneko ekukhuliseni inzala.
Mhlawumbi kunjalo. Kodwa ayichazi ukuba kutheni ukuthenwa ngomlomo kunomdla.
Xa ukhupha imali yakho, unikezela ngamandla akho, utshilo uDee. Ukungabi namandla kushushu. Enye yezona ndlela zovakalelo zokungamniki amandla umntu yimali. Yindlela yokuphuma kulawulo ngendlela enzulu yobuqu kunye nendlela yokwenyani yokwenyani. Akukho nto yefantasy esekwe ekunikezeleni ngaphezulu kwe- $ 500 yemali ebandayo enzima kwi-dom esidlangalaleni.
Abanye abathengi abazi nokuba kutheni ebajikisa kangaka.
URichard, 63, waseBrooklyn owacela ukuba singapapashi igama lakhe lokwenyani, ubekwi-S & M ukusukela oko wayeneminyaka eli-17 ubudala. Ukhubeke kulawulo lwemali ngengozi. Ngobunye ubusuku, i-dominatrix yesintu awayeyazi yambiza yaza yambuza ukuba uvukile na. Uthe wayekwivenkile yokutyela kwaye wayeshiye amakhadi akhe etyala ekhaya.
Uye wathi, 'Ngaba unokuba yinkwenkwe elungileyo kwaye uhlawule ityala? Baleka! ’URichard ukhumbula oku. Ukhawuleze waya ngaphaya, ulwakhiwo olungena ebhulukhweni yakhe, kwaye wenza ifolokhwe ngaphezulu kwemali. Uye wanqwala kuye-kwaye wamgxotha. Ukuvula bekukukhulu kakhulu.
Malunga neveki kamva wamthumelela isicatshulwa esinefoto yeebhutsi kunye nolwazi anokuluthengela ivenkile yaseVillage. Ngobo busuku, wabanikela kwigumbi lakhe waza wemka. Kwiiveki ezimbini kamva, wamcela ukuba adibane naye ngaseBattery Park City. Wafika ekhitshini, wehlisa ifestile, wakhwaza igama lakhe, kwaye wamkela i-200 yeedola awayeyiphakamisile. Emva koko waziphupa. Ekugqibeleni, wamvulela iakhawunti yebhanki.
Xa ndifunda malunga nolawulo lwezezimali ndacinga ukuba yinto ehlekisayo leyo, uyavuma. Ke xa yenzekayo kum ibivusa. Ayichaphazeli ulondolozo lobomi bam, kwaye ndiziva ngathi ndinceda umntu oyifunayo kwaye ndiye ndiziqhele.
UGeorge Collins, umbhali we Ukophula uMjikelo: Zikhulule ngokwakho kuTyala ngeSondo, ukujonga iZono, kunye neentloni Uqhuba ikliniki yokulutha ngokwesondo eWalnut Creek, Calif. Ukholelwa kwelokuba ityala kunye nehlazo zezona zinto ziqhuba-ubutyala bobutyebi babo kunye nempumelelo. 
U-Mistress Dee ufumana ukuya kuthi ga kwi-70,000 yeedola ngonyaka esenza into eyaziwa ngokuba kukudlwengulwa kwesipaji. (Ifoto: Emily Assiran / New York Braganca)
Abantu abanengqondo yabo ngokwabo ihlala isekwe ekubeni nemali banexhala elinxulumene nokuzixabisa kwabo, utshilo uMnu.Collins, owayesakuba sisini kunye nomlutha we-porn abaxhasi bakhe babandakanya abantu abadumileyo kunye nabaphathi abaphumeleleyo. Kukho ityala elingathethekiyo lokuba nemali, kwaye ukuthotywa kuphuma kwigumbi lokulala ngezi zinto zintle zemali. Ngokukodwa kwihlabathi lezezimali, akufani nokuba wenze into exabiseke ngokungaqhelekanga-yonke into oyenzileyo yenziwa imali.
Abafana abanemali yakudala ebuyela eMpuma-abo bantu banetyala ngenxa yokuba bengakhange bayenze imali yabo, uyaqhubeka Abafana abanemali entsha banokuziva benetyala ngokuxhomekeke kwindlela abayenze ngayo. Kuyabonakala ukuba isoyikiso sokungabinamali, kwezinye iikona, kushushu.
Sekunjalo, ukuba inkcubeko ayizange ifake imali, kukhuselekile ukuba imali ayiyi kuba yinxalenye yomntwana. Ngeendlela ezininzi, amadoda athatha inxaxheba kulawulo lwezezimali abonisa imali yawo. Yondla ii-egos-enye yazo ichazwa yimali, utshilo uMnu. Alpert, ugqirha wezengqondo kunye nombhali we Ungoyiki: Guqula uBomi bakho kwiintsuku ezingama-28 . Ifana nezinye iindlela ze-BDSM okanye iinkonzo zabantu abadala, imali ekucwangcisweni kweFin Dom uthenga ulonwabo. Indoda iyayoliswa kukuthotywa. Ngokudabukisayo, le ndoda ekugqibeleni ilawula i-dominatrix. Ngamanye amagama, ngaphandle kwemali akafumani le nto ayifunayo kunye nemali, angadlala le nto ayifunayo.
Eyona ntlekele inkulu, ubuncinci kwabo basemseleni, kukuba ubudlelwane kufuneka bube yimfihlo. U-Mistress Dee ufungela ukuba uninzi lwezinto azenzayo zilulamile kwaye zingenabungozi, kwaye ukhawuleze wagwetywa ngabantu abangayiqondiyo, utsho. Ndichitha ixesha elininzi ndijikeleze abathengi bam kodwa ndinaso nesam isabelo sexesha elisondeleyo nabantu ekuthiwa 'vanilla' kwihlabathi 'eliqhelekileyo'… Okukhona ndisiya ndibazi abantu, kokukhona ndiya ndiqonda ukuba akukho mntu kuyinto eqhelekileyo.
Wonke umntu, utshilo, unento yakhe engaqhelekanga.
