UAllan Block uneminyaka engama-44 ubudala. Uxabise ngaphezulu kwe- $ 100 yezigidi. Ukusukela ngo-1985, ufike eManhattan phantse zonke iimpelaveki evela kwidolophu yakowabo iToledo, eOhio, ukuza kunika amatheko amancinci… kunye nokufumana umfazi olungileyo.
Umnumzana Block ngumfana olingeneyo ngokwaneleyo, indoda engakholelwa kubusuku obunye bobusuku, kwaye iqala ukukhathazeka yinto yokuba ingekafumani mfazi oza kuba nguNksk. Kule minyaka idlulileyo, ubethandana nabasetyhini abaninzi eManhattan, wabasa eCipriani nakwi '21', kwaye uchithe ubusuku obuninzi ekhangela yedwa, kwiindawo ezinje ngeNell's kunye neLe Club kunye neAu Bar, kodwa okwangoku akakho mfazi.
Ndingathi bendinqwenela ukuba benditshatile ngaphambili ngoku, utshilo uMnu.Block, eqhuba ngeRoute 27 kwiFord Taurus eqeshiweyo esendleleni eya eSouthampton ngomnye uMgqibelo wakutshanje. Zange ndacinga ukuba ndingaba yile minyaka kwaye ndingazange nditshate. Yayingazange ibe licebo lam, uyazi. Ndicinga ukuba iimeko, indlela ekuyiyo namhlanje, sisizathu. Ndicinga ukuba kukho imfazwe phakathi kwezesini eziqhubekayo. Ndicinga ukuba icandelo labasetyhini belilwa imfazwe nenxalenye eyindoda. Amadoda nabasetyhini bahlala belingana, awunakuthelekisa isini nobuhlanga, ayizange ibe yinto efanelekileyo okanye uthelekiso. Akuzange kubekho mzamo ngabom wokubamba abantu basetyhini. Ubufazi buyinto engalunganga.
UMnu.Block unentombi yakhe ehlala eMilan, e-Itali, kodwa usemarikeni yomtshato. Ubona umfazi waseMilan inyanga nenyanga, kodwa usenokungathandi kakhulu ngombono wokuseka indlu eToledo. Kwaye leyo yinxalenye yesivumelwano ngalo naliphi na ibhinqa elitshata naye. UToledo uya kuba likhaya lakhe.
Ndinebhongo ngokuba ndiyinzalelwane yaseToledo, eOhio, utshilo. Kuyandicaphukisa xa ndisiva abantu abangazange bakho apho besithi, 'Leyo yeyona ndawo imbi elizweni!' Umntu omnye, intombazana enye, intombazana esisimumu, yathi, 'Inokuba yindawo embi kakhulu leyo. Kwaye ndathi, 'Yeyona ndawo iphambili yedolophu! Abantu abangama-800,000, iiyunivesithi ezimbini eziphambili, ikholeji yezonyango ezimeleyo, iimyuziyam eziphezulu, i-zoo ebalaseleyo, imyuziyam yesayensi kunye nomzi mveliso, iipaki ezintle, iLake Great kunye nawo onke amathuba okuzonwabisa ameleyo. IToledo inokuba yindawo entle ukuba utshatele nabantwana.
Akululanga kangako, ukuba sisityebi, indoda engatshatanga ngo-1999.
Ndingathanda ukungatshati ngo-1950, 1955, utshilo uMnu. Ndingathanda ukuba bendisebenza nalo mfazi wayefuna ukutshata okanye kwakufuneka atshate. Ndicinga ukuba bekuya kuba lula kakhulu. Andikwazi ukuqhuba indlu, andinakuba nendlu entle. Ndingayisayina itshekhi.
Kwinqaku lowe-1993, iphephancwadi iForbes labeka ixabiso lokushishina nosapho- iToledo, eOhio, iBlade Communications- ngama- $ 600 ezigidi. UMnu Block ungumnini wesiqingatha seBlade kunye newele lakhe, uJohn. UJohn Block ngumshicileli kunye nomhleli oyintloko wamaphephandaba (Toledo Blade, Pittsburgh Post-Gazette) ngelixa u-Allan ekhokela izikhululo zikamabonakude kunye noqhakamshelwano lwecomputer.
Inkampani yaqalwa ekuqaleni kwenkulungwane ngutatomkhulu wabo, uPaul Block, Sr., umlobi wephephandaba owayedlamkile owayehlala noCharles Lindbergh, Irving Berlin, HG Wells, uWilliam Randolph Hearst, usodolophu weSixeko saseNew York uJimmy Walker, iRhuluneli yaseNew York u-Al Smith kunye noFranklin Delano Roosevelt. Usapho lakwaBlock luqeshe umbhali ngobomi babantu uFrank Brady ukuba abhale ibali lobomi bukasolusapho.
Ngokuhlwa kwangolwesiHlanu, u-Mnu. I-Champagne kwibha yehotele yamaXesha amaZine kwi-East 57th Street. Isidlo sangokuhlwa eSerafina kwi-East 61st Street. Iziselo kunye neecuba kumnyango olandelayo kaBrown, apho umculo we-goa waseIndiya wawudubula, emva koko waya e-Au Bar, kwi-East 58th Street.
Ngesinye isikhathi, uMnu.Block wathi ngokuqinisekileyo wayengenantloni ngokuba yindlalifa. Andizukuxakwa yiyo, utshilo. Andizukuzifihla kuyo. Ukuba umntu uthi, ‘Ufike njani kule ndawo ukuyo?’ Bendiya kuthi, ‘Ndiyifumene njengelifa!’ Andithandabuzi ukuyamkela le nto.
Xa umhlobo wakhankanya umdlalo wepolo eBridgehampton, wathi, ngokugculelayo, ndiyikhathalele iPittsburgh Pirates kwaye andikhathali ngamanqaku epolo.
Ukuncokola nokudlala ngothando
Waxubusha kwaye wathandana nomfazi ogama linguShirley ngokuhlwa kwaye wahlawula wonke umntu ubusuku bonke kunye nekhadi lakhe leDin's's Club. Kwaye kwabuyela kwigumbi lakhe elincinci eRitz Tower kwi-East 57th Street.
Emva kwemini elandelayo, uMnumzana uBlock uvele kwi-ofisi yeemoto eziqeshisayo eHertz kwisitalato i-55th. Wayenxibe ijini esele ziphelile kunye nezonka zase Italiyane. Ithoni yakhe kunye nomabhalana kaHertz yayinamandla. Kwindawo yokupaka engaphantsi komhlaba, wayifumana iTaurus yakhe. Kungekudala, wayesenza iikhilomitha ezingama-60 ngeyure kwiLong Island Expressway – esiya ngaseSouthampton ngenzuzo – kwaye ethetha ngabafazi.
Ndicinga ukuba uninzi lwazo luxabiso lwangaphandle kwintengiso, utshilo. Uninzi lwazo alunanto lukhulu luyiyo kwaye lukhetha ukuya kwinqanaba elingenangqondo. Uva yonke le migca, 'Akukho madoda alungileyo, akukho madoda alungileyo,' kwaye akukho madoda alungileyo ukuba uxabiso liphuma kwintengiso. Ingenza ntoni onke la mantombazana… uyazi laa ntetho indala isuka eBhayibhileni, Musa ukugweba hleze ugwetywe? Ukuba bafuna ukuwisa isigwebo emadodeni, ukuba bafuna ukukhethwa, ndiza kubabuza ukuba bazibuze, ‘Yintoni le indenza ndilunge kangaka? Kutheni ndinesikhundla esiphakamileyo kangangokuba ndinelungelo loku? ’Ndakhe ndeva abasetyhini baseNew York basebenzisa igama elithi‘ banelungelo ’ukuchaza into ekufuneka benayo. Mangaphi amantombazana acinga ukuba anelungelo lokufumana indlu kweli lizwe, kwindlu enkulu yeFifth Avenue? Mangaphi amantombazana acinga ukuba anelungelo, angaveli kwaphela kulolo hlobo lwemvelaphi, angenandlela yokuzifumanela wona? Kwaye elona thuba baya kulifumana kukutshata. Baziva benelungelo kuyo. Ngoba? Oku kuhlekisa.
Ezinye zazo zinomtsalane. Ezinye zazo zazinomtsalane. Amanye ala mantombazana adlala umdlalo omde kakhulu. Intombazana yakha yathi kum, 'Ndicinga ukuba indoda esisityebi kunye nebhinqa elihle ziyinto enye,' ndaza ndathi kuye, 'Abafazi abahle baninzi kakhulu kunamadoda azizityebi anayo, abeka imali ngokwenyani.' Ngamanye amagama, ukuba indoda inemali ngokwenene, inqabile kakhulu kunentombazana ene-1 yepesenti ephezulu.
Wakhumbula umfazi othile kumhlobo wakhe. Ndiyithandile le ntombazana, watsho, kodwa wasebenzisa igama elithi ‘unelungelo.’ Ndinelungelo! Indlu ekwi-Gin Lane, igumbi elikhulu, ijeti yabucala, zonke ezi zinto. Wayevela kwindawo yokumisa iinqwelo erhuqwayo emantla! Wayengumbuki zindwendwe kwindawo yokutyela kwenye indawo. Omnye umgca endiwuvileyo uthi, 'Umama uzinzile-andizukuhlala!' Impendulo yam ithi, 'Uzama nje ukuthethelela ukwaliwa kwamadoda amaninzi alungileyo! Awuyi kufumana nto! Okanye, awuzukuba nanto. ’… Ndicinga ukuba abanye baba bafazi bangama-40 balinde ngabom ixesha elide. Asithethi ngamakhosikazi omsebenzi apha, sithetha ngabafazi abaziziyatha, ngokokubona kwam, bafuna kakhulu. Ndicinga ukuba iya kuba yintlekele kuninzi lwabo, kwaye uninzi lwezi aluqinisekanga ngokwemali ebomini. Lo mdlalo abawudlalileyo usebenze kakuhle kwiminyaka engama-20 nengama-30, ngamanye amaxesha nakwi-40's-kodwa xa la mantombazana eneminyaka engama-60, kuza kwenzeka ntoni? Kuza kwenzeka ntoni kubo? Luhlobo olufana nenqwelomoya olungena emhlabeni. Kusoloko kukho ithuba abanye abantu abaza kukwazi ukutsala intonga baphakamise inqanaba lenqwelo moya phambi kokuba lityumke, kodwa ndinoluvo lokuba uninzi lwabo luza kuwophula umhlaba ngamandla, kwaye ndiziva kakubi ngale nto. Ndicinga ukuba lilishwa.
Uqhubeke wathi: Enye inyani malunga nemeko yesondo yobudlelwane baseNew York phakathi kwamadoda nabasetyhini yipesenti encinci yamadoda, ipesenti encinci kakhulu, ifumana ipesenti engalinganiyo yesenzo somzimba. Iipesenti ezilishumi zamadoda okanye ngaphantsi zenza iipesenti ezingama-60 zokujija.
Ndiyabacaphukela abo bafana! Ndithe.
`` Andikwazi kusebenzisa abantu ''
Inxalenye yayo banamaxabiso ahlukeneyo kunye nokuziphatha. Kufuneka ungaziva. Abasetyhini njengamadoda angaziva nto, abanokuthetha ubuxoki ukuba bafumane le nto bayifunayo, emva koko bathi ndlela-ntle. Ngamanye amagama, ukunyaniseka ayisiyondlela ilungileyo yokufumana ukubekwa kwisiXeko saseNew York, ukuba awutshatanga namhlanje. Omnye umfana, umhlobo wam oyindoda, wathi kanye, 'Allan, awuyifumani.' Ndathi, 'Andiyifumani?' 'Siyabajija kwaye siyazilahla.' Ndathi, 'Mhlawumbi uyayenza loo nto, kodwa ngekhe ndiyenze loo nto.' Andisoze ndimlahle umntu. Xa ndikunye nomntu, lowo ngomnye umntu oneemvakalelo. Andikwazi ukusebenzisa abantu.
Enye into?
Elinye inqaku endinokulithetha: abanye abantu bacinga ukuba amalungelo esini awonzakalisi mntu, kodwa ndingathi ukuba ndiyindoda engaphezulu kweminyaka engama-40 ubudala, intshukumo yamafanasini iyenzakalisa-ngokuqinisekileyo iyingozi kwisikhundla sam, kuba ndingowesini esahlukileyo umntu ngamnye. Kwixesha elidlulileyo, ngendandifumene ikhredithi ngaloo nto. Namhlanje, abantu bathi, 'Kutheni ungatshatanga?' Okanye, 'Mhlawumbi ulifanasini.'
Ke amalungelo esini aphume esandleni?
Ndiza kuthetha ngokwam. Ndingumntu olondolozayo kulo mbandela. Ndingumntu onyamezelayo, kodwa ndiyakholelwa ukuba isini yinto eyimfihlo kwaye kufuneka ihlale iyimfihlo. Andikholelwa ekubonakaliseni ngokwesini esidlangalaleni, ixesha. Ukuba umntu uthi, 'Ewe, ayilunganga,' ndingathi, 'Kulungile, ngoku sinokuba nokuziphatha ngo-1950 ukuya kuthi ga ekuboniseni ubufanasini.' Kodwa andikholelwa ukuba abantu abathandana nabathandana nabanye kufanele ukuba bayamanga esidlangalaleni, abantu abathandana nabangatshatanga – andikholelwa kubantu abangamafanasini ngokuphandle! Kwakuqhele ukuba sisifo sengqondo. Namhlanje bacinga ukuba kukho izinto zebhayoloji-eyona nto iphambili yile, impendulo kuloo nto iya kuba kukubonisa ukuba i-schizophrenia inesiseko sebhayiloji. Uzalelwe neschizophrenia, nayo, kodwa akukho namnye othi, 'Kulungile, yinto eqhelekileyo leyo.'
Ke ugxothwa bubufanasini?
Ukhutshiwe. Ndiyathetha, indoda ingayenza yonke into nomntu obhinqileyo anokuyenza ngendoda, kodwa ungakwenza okungakumbi ngowasetyhini, uyazi? Andiboni ukuba kutheni indoda ingafuna indoda xa inokuba nemazi.
Nazo naziphi na ezinye iimbono zekhontrakthi?
Umbono we-craziest oya kuwava kum, ungathathwa ngokuba uphambene – ungathathwa njengempambano! Yiba ngothatayo. Kodwa ndicinga ukuba izakwenzeka ebomini bethu. Ndiyakholelwa ukuba siza kulibona ilizwe lasentla elisemida yethu lisaphuka. Ngumcimbi nje nini! Siza kuba nelizwe elinye elithetha isiNgesi eMntla Melika.
Ukusondela ku-70, UMnu.Block uxoxe ngobuntwana bakhe. Wakhulela kwindlu enkulu eToledo. Wahlala eCalifornia, eSwitzerland naseParis. Unina, owayesakuba yintatheli kunye nomhleli, wasweleka xa yena newele lakhe babeneminyaka emihlanu. AmaNannies kunye nomgcini wendlu obalaseleyo waseScotland babakhulisa. Kwakukho nomama wesibini, umlungiseleli wakhe wadibana noyise kwiklabhu yasebusuku. UMnu Block wayenobudlelwane obunzima kunye naye de waba mdala. Uyise, uPaul Block, Omnci, wayengumshicileli kunye ne-organic chemist eyanceda ukuphuhlisa isongezelelo kwiingxaki ze-thyroid.
Inkumbulo yam yokuqala, utshilo uMnu.Block, kuxa utata wam wanika umntakwethu iqhosha laseKennedy wathi, 'UnguMdemokhrasi,' kwaye ndanikwa iqhosha likaNixon ndaza ndaxelelwa, 'UnguRiphabhlikhi.'
Ngo-1969, xa wayeneminyaka eli-14 ubudala, uAllan waya kwisikolo iLawrenceville eNew Jersey. Wayengu-hawkish eVietnam, ngaphandle kwenani eliphantsi kwikhadi lakhe eliyidrafti kunyaka wakhe omkhulu. KwiYunivesithi yasePennsylvania, uMnu.Block udume kunqulo. Emva koko, wagqibela ngokufudukela kwishishini losapho.
AbaNtsundu abaBala
Kwiveki emva kokuba kuyiwe eSouthampton, ngolwesiHlanu ngorhatya, uMnu Block wayekwitafile engaphandle eLa Goulue, ejonge lo mbono. Uyabona ukuba lowo ukuphela kwetafile? wahlebeza, esalatha kumfazi ophelelwe li-blonde esela ibhiya kunye nokutshaya i-Marlboro Lights, yedwa. Ngomnye wabo! Wayenqonqoza ngokupheleleyo, ndade ndadibana naye kwiminyaka emine edlulileyo. Uthetha intombazana enokubanayo nayiphi na indoda, enje! Jonga indlela akhangeleka ngayo ngoku. Le yintombazana eyatshata nomdlali othile wentenetya, umntu awayecinga ukuba ulunge ngokwenyani, kodwa eyona nto iphambili apha, yile iphele nomntu ongalunganga- uqhawule umtshato kwiminyaka emithathu. Olo lulwaphulo-mthetho. Le yintombazana ebinokuba nayo nayiphi na indoda kwaye ucinga ukuba ifumana ntoni namhlanje? Iphi intombazana enje? Andazi.
UJames Tully, opeyintayo, uphakanyisiwe. Yintoni entsha, ndoda? uthe. Ukuhlala upholile?
Uza njani umzobo wakho? Utshilo uMnu.
Kuhamba kakuhle.
Ujongeka wahlukile kancinci-iinwele zakho zahlukile ngandlela thile.
Andazi, utshilo uMnu. Tully. Andiyiteketisi kangako. Kude, ndiyayazi lonto.
Ijongeka ingcono kancinci, utshilo uMnu Block. Ndiyathetha, bendiyithanda ngaphambili, kodwa ndiyayithanda ngoku.
Ngokwenene? Ndiza kuyithatha njengoncoma. Ndiyazi ukuba bendidlalela umdlalo kujongeka okumanzi ngakumbi, kodwa bendicinga ukuba ndiyishiye ngasemva kwi-80's.
Iinwele zam zitshintshile, nazo. Imfutshane, nayo.
Umnumzana Block wayala i-espresso yakhe yesibini wathi molo kumfana ongenakhaya, uMiles, osebenza kule ndawo. Ndikhathazekile ngawe, ubuphi? Unike uMiles ibhilikhwe yeedola ezingama-20.
Waphinda wajonga lo mfazi unebala elimnyama.
Leya ntombazana eyayiphezulu ngokupheleleyo kwi-80's, eyona intombazana intle, edibeneyo apha kwi-80's, khange iqonde ukuba kuya kufuneka uyifake imali, utshilo. Umntu othile kufuneka alunge ngokwaneleyo. Abazange bakuqonde oko, kwaye baya kwicala elingaphantsi kwegophe kwaye baqhubeka behla, behla, behla, kwaye ngoku bawele eweni kwaye abanalo ithemba. Uninzi lwezi aluzange lwenze nje oko lwalufanele ukuba luyenze xa lwalumele ukuba luyenzile.
Wayigqiba i espresso yakhe.
