RIP, wena mdlwenguli owayedlwengula, (ifoto: Ixesha lokubonisa) Intro: Scotty Lockhart, kuculwa kukho indlu e blah blah risiiiiiing ilanga. FADE OUT, ISIHLOKO IKHADI:
Icandelo lokuqala: Drew
Ewe bafana, sitshintsha yonke into yokuphela kwesiphelo. Ndiya kuqala ngoku, iimbumba! Kwaye ndinento enye endinokuyithetha:
Njengaye, ngaba inokuba yinto yam yonke leyo? U-Heath Ledger ucothisa nje kancinci ejele, apho ngethemba uya kugqiba ukuthunga isiqhushumbisi kwilizwe elibi-lomntu-ngandlela ithile-nangoku-ayingombulali-wobuchwephesha, uNowa Solloway? Hayi? Argh. Kulungile, kuthekani ukuba ndiphosa olunye lwezi ntsana? Kushushu oomatshini bokushicilela kuvavanyo lwe amakhonkco ayingozi phakathi UMgcini ?
Kuba ekupheleni kosuku, ngubani owayenguMcGuffin omkhulu kunoMnu Solloway? Umfana obonakala ngathi ukhohlakele kuVungqe kwiveki ephelileyo utyhilwe njengenye into ngaphandle kokuba ngumlingane emva kwezibakala, iphindwe kabini. Ngexesha lokuqala, unyanzela uHelen emva kwevili emva kokuba besele isondo lolwandle ngexesha lomtshato kaCole Lockhart. Yabona, uNowa akakwazi ukuqhuba, njengoko enezinto ezifanayo ezibonisa ukukhanya kwasekuqaleni ukusukela ekuqaleni kwesizini, ngaphandle kwaxa bekungamaxesha angenaxesha lakhe lonke eMontanauk. Ewe, ulibale ukufa kukaScotty kunye netyala lokubulala elilandelayo, ewe! UNowa Solloway, ilizwi lesizukulwana sakhe (ngaphandle kweFranzen!) ayizanga ngexesha! Kwaye ngoku angabhala okokuthengisa ngokuthengisa, Ngeso sihlanu ! UNowa ke ngoko ulapha ukuza kubona ukusweleka kukaScotty Lockhart, okwenzekayo xa sele sele uDUI uHelen emqhuba ngemoto kaSolloway. WOMP-WOMP! Uxolo, sisandi somzimba sikaScotty esenziwe. Kodwa kwakhona, mna noVinnie sabiza le meko kwangoko kwiveki ephelileyo: Ngaba uVinnie uye wangazinzi ngexesha kwaye wahamba waya kwikamva lokudibanisa isiphelo sikaSarah Treem nesinye isibini esibi kwiTV kwimemori yakutshanje? (Ngaphandle kukaNowa Solloway + Alison, ewe.) Kuba uSolloway nguBlomquist-ed Kabini : ayinguye kuphela umfazi wakhe wangaphambili owayebaleka umfana owankqonkqoza intombi yabo kwaye wonakalisa ubomi bakhe kwaye (uyakholelwa, okanye ubuncinci kufuneka sikholelwe ukuba uyakholelwa) UCanzibe unkqonkqoze i-fiancee yakhe (jonga indlela uAlison amazisa ngayo kwixesha lakhe lokuba uJoanie akangowakhe, kodwa kanjalo ayichazi ukuba angangumntwana kabani ngeli xesha bajonge iScotty ngesondo ukukhala njengeZilwanyana?); Uyazi nokuba uScotty watyhalwa phambi kwemoto nguAlison, ubukhulu becala ngenxa yokuba enombono omkhulu we-hawk kwitimeline yakhe apho anokumbona ethetha amazwi endimtyhalele isigidigidi amaxesha kwibhrashi yangaphantsi. (Apho bekukho i isikhephe esihamba ngasemva ? Leyo yinkcukacha engaqhelekanga yokubandakanya, kodwa uqinisekile.) HA HA kodwa * nokuhlekisa ngefart *: UNowa ugqiba kwelokuba afike ekubulaweni kukaScotty kunokuba ajongane nengqumbo yabafazi babini ebomini bakhe ababedibene ngokwasemoyeni, mhlawumbi ngemijikelezo yenyanga yabo, njengoLuisa. Ndiyathetha, igqibelele: UHelen noAlison bobabini babulala uScotty ngelixa uNowa ecoca ubumdaka. Eyona nto ayifaneleyo ukuyenza, emva kokuhlekisa ngobuso babo bobabini-amaxesha amaninzi ngaphambili. Nangona ngoku sisazi ukuba uNowa umsulwa kwesona siganeko siphambili, ukumphosa phantsi kwebhasi (ngokuthetha njalo) kubonakala kungekuphela nje ngokulungileyo (wayigubungela, yimoto yakhe, uchaphazeleka ngaphaya kwenkolelo kwaye wonke umntu uyazi) kodwa kulungile. Izizathu, nkqu. Kwenye indawo, mhlawumbi kubomi basemazulwini emva kokufa- apho iScotty ihlala ikhupha khona ingelosi ethile eThe End- ileja ilinganisiwe. Yinto ebhaliweyo ebhalwe ngokugqibeleleyo eyi-101 shit. Umsebenzi olungileyo, uSarah Treem. Nangona ndimi emva kwezimvo zalo mfo kwi-Intanethi malunga Umcimbi nje: Isenokuba ndibone elona xesha libalaseleyo lomdlalo weTV kwimbali yayo nantoni na. Bekufanelekile ixesha lama-21 lokwakha #Ukugqitywa kweNdiza -Edward Umdala (@EdwardElder) UDisemba 21, 2015 Njengaye, leyo yayiyinzuzo enkulu, ngokungathandabuzekiyo. Kodwa ngaba yayixabisa iziqendu ezingama-21 ezinkulu? Ngaba bekufanelekile zonke iithiyori zabalandeli kunye neembono ezininzi kunye nokuzalwa okungapheliyo malunga ne-Oblivion kunye ne-feud kunye ne-ranch kunye nendlu (indlu kabani? Khetha nje indlu!) , Njengo-Oscar noMax nje ngokubanzi? Ngaba oku (malunga) nesiphelo seyure ezimbini zokulungela ukukulinda, okwakubonakala ngathi akunakuphela njengeesabatha phakathi kweencwadi zikaNowa? Ndi… ngokunyaniseka, andiqinisekanga. Ngamaxesha athile, bendikruqukile Umcimbi . Ukuba ndiyibukele yayingumsebenzi; Inzondo yam yasebusuku yangeCawa ifaniswe kuphela nokuzonda kwam Umcuphi wokwenene Ixesha lesi-2. Ukufumanisa ukuba uTreem wayenecebo eliyintloko ngalo lonke elixesha akundiniki ezo yure zobomi bam, a nangona ukukhuthazwa ngababhali benkqubo kwimidiya yoluntu Ngokuqinisekileyo uncede nalaa maxesha amnyama. Kwelinye icala, mna unobubele yokufuna ukubuyela ekuqaleni kwesizini yesibini kwaye ndiyibukele yonke kwakhona, ndisazi endikwaziyo ngoku. (Kusenemibuzo ephambili: ngaba uHelen uyazi ukuba uAlison utyhale iScotty? Ngaba uCole uyazi ukuba unoJoanie? Ngaba uCole uyazi ukuba ngubani owabulala iScotty? Ngaba uCole wakha wazi nto?) Ndithetha ukuba, andizukuyenza loo nto, kuba kanye ukulunywa, kabini UKUHLALA JIKELELE ISIDLO SOKUDLA NESIMFIYO ESOYIKISAYO PHAKATHI KWABO. * HINT HINT * YIMBULALA. Kodwa njenge, in ithiyori , yinto evulekileyo ukuba ndiyenze. Kwaye ndiyaqikelela, ewe, ukuba iliwa elihombisayo elinegama lam lanyanzeliswa entlokweni yam kwaye kwafuneka ndikhethe indlela Umcimbi (Ngaphandle kokuqhwaba kancinci, kunjalo), iya kuba yile: Umcimbi bubungqina bokuba ubugcisa bokwenyani bunokuyenza kwifomathi kamabonakude, kwezi ntsuku zokugqibela ngaphambi kokuba yonke into ibe kukuzinkcinkca ngotywala kube kanye; xa kungekho nto inokuphangwa kuba yonke into iyaziwa. Mhlawumbi umbuzo wokuba ngubani owabulala uScotty Lockhart? ayisiyonto inomdla njenge-Who Who Bulala uLaura Palmer?, kodwa ndiza kukuxelela… intlawulo yayisisihlandlo esiphindaphindwe ngesigidi, hayi kancinci kuba uTreem wayeyazi ukuba impendulo ibiyintoni ngelixesha lonke. Bravo, Umcimbi . IBravo. Icandelo lesibini: Vinnie Ukuba Umcimbi kwaye nditshatile, Umcimbi Ndingaziqhatha ngokupheleleyo. Iyaqondakala. Ndicela kude kakhulu kuyo. Isizini ephelileyo yandinika ifomathi yeembono eyahlukileyo ngokugqibeleleyo, kwaye ndafuna ubungakanani obunye. Xa indithengele imfihlakalo yokubulala ngeKrisimesi, ndancwina ndayixelela ukuba ndifuna abasemzini. Kutheni ungeke ufane nje Ilahlekile ? Nditshilo, ndibhekisa kwenye ye ex zam ezininzi. Okanye iiTwin Peaks? Nditsho ngexesha lasebusuku ekhethekileyo-ekhethekileyo-eyandisiweyo-nge-8ish-imizuzu Ukuphela kwexesha, ndicele kakhulu. Ndifuna ukuba ii-shenanigans zaselwandle ezinxilisayo zikaHelen kunye noNowa batshintshele ngaphandle komthungo bavule Imihlathi . Ndifuna ukutyhilwa okukhulu ukuba uScotty Lockhart uyi-werewolf – akukho nto injalo, bendifuna ukuba iiLockharts zibe lusapho olunye olukhulu lwee-werewolves – yiyo loo nto uScotty wayehamba ezantsi kweyona ndlela inkungu yehlabathi phakathi ezinzulwini zobusuku. Ngalo lonke elixesha, Umcimbi yayakha isiya esiphelweni (okanye ISIPHELO) esasingaqhelekanga, okanye sivelele, okanye sichukumise ingqondo. Yonke into eyenziweyo yayikukuyenza iyonke, iphelele, ingqiqo epheleleyo . Ke nasi isisombululo sokuba ngubani obulale uScotty Lockhart? WONKE umntu wabulala uScotty Lockhart. UHelen, osele ene-DUI egameni lakhe, wayeqhuba imoto. UAlison wamtyhalela kwindlela. Nditsho noCole, owayengekho kwindawo yolwaphulo-mthetho, wagxotha uScotty kwiinyanga ezintathu zokuba sempilweni. Ngelishwa, hilariily, kunye s o ngokufanelekileyo umntu onegalelo ekuphela kwakhe ekufeni kukaScotty Lockart yayingu-uggghh ndinxile kakhulu OH AKUKHO MNTU UNGAYIYIYI-DEER, UHELEN wayenguNowa. Sasicinga njani ukuba uNowa wayenakho ukubulala ngogonyamelo? Emva kwamaxesha amabini apheleleyo okubukela uNowa esebenza, ndingothuka ukuba uNowa wayenokwenza ubusela obuncinci ngaphandle kokutyibilika kwixolo lebhanana. Ndandihlala ndicinga Umcimbi yayingu-99% malunga nolwalamano lokwenyani, kwaye imfihlakalo yokubulala yayisitya nje esisecaleni ukugcina abantu bengathandi ukubuya kobuso be-goblin ye-Dominican West. Kodwa kunjalo Impendulo yokuba ngubani obulale iScotty Lockhart inxibelelene nombono wento leyo. Kwelinye icala kwakusoloko kukho uHelen, kwelinye icala yayinguAlison, kwaye wabanjwa embindini, waqhuqha, wakhubeka (nakwibhafu efanayo eshushu njengentombi yakhe) yayinguNowa. Kutheni ukufa kukaScotty kufanele kwahluke? Inxalenye endiyithandayo yesi sigqibo, ngaphandle yonke , Ngaba ukhetha ukuthetha inyani ngokusweleka kukaScotty emapoliseni kunokuthelekiswa nayo yonke into eyenziwe nguNowa, uHelen kunye noAlison emva. Kulungile, ukuthetha inyani, andikaze ngengozi ndibulale umntakwabo-ntombazana owayesakuba ngumkhwenyana wakhe. Ewe, ubuncinci hayi ngemoto. Ke andazi ukuba isebenza njani yonke le nto, okanye indlela efanelekileyo yokuphendula. Kodwa ukubiza amapolisa ndiwaxelele ukuba umntu othengisa utywala KANYE nomthengisi weziyobisi wabethwa yimoto akuthandabuzeki kangako kunokuba abuyele emtshatweni kunye nokucotha ukudanisa umdaniso wokubulala iyelenqe kuhlobo lomculo USimon noGarfunkel njengoko kugutyungelwe liqela lomtshato elimhlophe. Ewe, uHelen ufumana ibhondi entle kuba isekwe kulwazi lwam lomthetho, ulwaphulo-mthetho lwesibini i-DUI + ukubulawa kwabantu ngenqwelo moya = UMOYA WOMOYA . Le yeyona nxalenye ndingakhange ndiyithenge malunga nesiphelo, esisekwe kwisityhilelo u-Joannie eneneni-intombi ka-Cole kunye nolwandle olunxilileyo oludadayo-oko, kwakhona, kungabandakanyeki kookrebe-uNowa ukulungele ukuphosa wonke umntu phantsi kwebhasi engumzekeliso. ukukhusela uHelen. Ke sicinga ukuba kwenzeka ntoni okwethutyana, phakathi komtshato kaCole kunye noNowa ukutsala a UJim Carrey ungene Isendle, sasendle Ngethuba lokuxoxwa kwetyala lakhe ? Ndicinga ukuba uAlison noNowa bahlala phantsi kwizidlo ezininzi besazi imfihlo embi, emnyama. Njengoko umhleli kaNowa watshoyo, kwaye ndicacisa apha, ukuba ukuphela kweebhola kuyancancisa, bhuti. Ngethamsanqa, enkosi kubuhle beTV kunye Umcimbi 'Abasebenzi bokubhala ebe ukufihla okumangalisayo ngeli xesha lonke , ayisosiphelo. Inyaniso, Umcimbi isombulule eyona mfihlakalo inkulu kwaye ngokwenza njalo, isinike eminye imibuzo eliwaka. Asikayazi ukuba yeyiphi indima edlalwa nguCole kunye nelitha lakhe elibi kuyo yonke le nto. Okanye indlela uWhitney asabela ngayo ekufeni komlingane wakhe owayethandana nengcuka uScotty Lockhart. Okanye loluphi usizi, umntu olusizi ofuna ukuthatha Inzala uhambo lokuhamba ngeenxa zonke eMontanauk. Nokuba yeyiphi na indlela, uScotty ufile kwaye umdla wam uyahlatywa. Thixo, Umcimbi, Ndiyazi ukuba andikufanele ukubuyiselwa umva, kodwa ndiza kuqhuba ndigqithe endlwini yakho emvuleni kwaye ngamanye amaxesha ndikhala ngelixa ndibukele ibali lakho le-SnapChat. Kude kube ngumtshato olandelayo waseMontanauk, wena Globe entle yokuphumelela umdlalo wexesha lokubonisa.
IDominic West iyazi ukuba ukuze umhlaba uhambise naluphi na uhambiso olukhulu, umntu makasoloko ephela nge hlekisa uFart . Ukuba ujonga apho ubeke khona i-fart ehlekisayo kwisiphelo se-epic Umcimbi- -esisandla sika thixo, kwandithatha iiyure ezimbini ukuyibukela, nangona ndingacacanga ukuba obona bubude bexesha lesiqendu okanye ukuba yakha iyure eyongezelelekileyo yokumisa ukucothisa-kulungile, ndiyathanda ukucinga ukuba uhlekisiwe Ukuhamba lonke eli xesha, manenekazi nenjengele. Ukuhlekisa ngobuso babo bonke.
