'I-Affair' Ixesha le-3 yeNkulumbuso yokuQala kwakhona: I-Arc kaNowa

Icandelo I: Drew

Ndoda, ubukhumbula? Umcimbi , Vinnie? Andikwazi ukuxelela ukuba ndenze okanye hayi. Ngokukodwa ngenxa yokuba inkumbulo yam yexesha elidlulileyo ihamba: Into, into, uCarmine Falcone isashwankathela eMontanauk (iyacaca), into, Ihlaya likaFranzen , into, OH UTHIXO WAM UZA KULALA NENDODAKAZI YAKHE?, into, umntwana onesifo seappendicitis, into ethile, isiqendu esihle noMaura Tierney kunye nembiza yokuloba, enye into, uScotty wenza into entle UChris Isaak kumdlalo bhanyabhanya kaDavid Lynch uluvo, into, * hlekisa uFart , emva koko YINGCWELE! ESI SIPHELO!

Elo yayililo lonke ixesha lesibini, kangangoko ndinokukhumbula. Ndiyathetha, bekukho ngathi isibhozo esiqinileyo sokutsha kweFranzen, kodwa ndiyisongele.

Lo ayingomboniso sibuyele kuwo. Kodwa ngaphambi kokuba sifike kwisiqingatha sesibini sesiqendu, esingakhange sithathe umbono ohlukileyo wokubalisa kangangokuba saba SHOW ENGAKUMBI NGOKUQWALASELISA, masikhe sihambise iinxalenye endizibhalileyo ngaphambi kokuba ndibukele iDominic West (isilumkiso somonakalisi) UMNQOBO WAKHE UTHIXO KWI-SHITTY, ENGAKUMBI KWIKHAMPUSI E… Ndifuna ukuthi Rutgers? Ndiyazi ukuba ubuye apho, Vin, kodwa ndiqinisekile ukuba yiRutgers. Okukho okubi. Kuya kuba mnandi, kuba amanqaku am kwisiqingatha sokuqala sale nkulumbuso anethoni eyahluke mpela kunamanqaku am ukusuka kwisiqingatha sesibini, olu luhlobo lwesipili esimnandi kwindlela uSara Treem ayenzileyo kwisizini yokugqibela kaNowa Solloway Amava okuba kunjani ukuba ngumfazi xa (mhlawumbi?) edlwengulwe ejele, kodwa ke kusenzima ngandlel 'ithile ngokungabi yihagu egwenxa kubafundi bakhe.

Into enomdla kukuba, eyokudlalwa ngaphezulu komdlalo ayizange iyenze icace gca ukuba zeziphi izibonda zikaNowa Salloway okanye usapho olwandisiweyo olungasebenziyo. Ke ukuba awuzange uwubone umboniso ngaphambili, kodwa ngempazamo ucofe eli qhekeza, nantsi into oza kuyibona: ukuba uNowa athabathe ukuwa kukaHelen, kodwa hayi indawo uAlison atyhala ngayo iScottie esitratweni, ngokungakhathali ibangela ukubetha kunye -baleka. Eyona nto ndiyikhumbulayo, ukuwela kukaNowa usiba lwakhe (yifumane? Kuba inamandla kunesifungo… * UKUGXEKA FART *) kwaye evuma UKUBULALELA usibali wakhe khange asebenze kuba ibiyinto elungileyo ukuyenza – ngokucacileyo Ukubulawa kuka-2 ngo-Helen, nditsho ne-DUI yakhe yokuqhuba ngembiza kwindawo yokupaka izithuthi, kuya kuthwala isigwebo esibi kakhulu kuneso sokubulala, ngakumbi ukuba kuye kwafumaniseka ukuba uScotty waphoswa phambi kwemoto ngompu osuka kudade wangaphambili -umazala wakhe wayezama ukudlwengula - kodwa kuba yayingu ubuqhawe kwaye isidima into yokwenza.

Yeyiphi idiotic. Kodwa uNowa Solloway yindoda enebali lakhe elibaluleke ngaphezu kwayo nayiphi na into. Kufuneka azingqine ukuba ungumfo olungileyo, ukulungele ukuzincama ngenxa yabasetyhini abathandayo, nangona eneneni eyisilumko nje esingenabugovu, esinobukrwada kunye nengxilimbela eyomeleleyo kuyo nantoni na enesiketi. UNowa Sollaway angangumntu ohlekisayo ukuba lo mboniso uzithathe kancinci kancinci. (Inqaku elibukhali: Ndi… ndibhale oku ndibona isiqingatha sokuqala somboniso. Thixo wam. Kutheni le nto ingasentla inganyani nje? Ndiyayikhumbula indlela endandingenangqondo ngayo, kwimizuzu engamashumi amathathu eyadlulayo.)

Kodwa kuba yile Umcimbi , asivumelekanga ukuyifumana iyinto ehlekisayo ukuba siyivula kuNowa oneendevu, sijonge etafileni ENTSHA kumfazi OMTSHA (ngemfihlo eyoyikekayo phakathi kwabo? Ngubani owaziyo!) (kulungile, kuyacaca ukuba ngudade kaNowa, kodwa Ngaba WAYEKHE wavela kumboniso ngaphambili?) (ebuza umhlobo), ukusikwa kwangoko kumlinganiswa wethu ophambili- umbhali! -ngakhange alungiselele nantoni na yomngcwabo katata. Uthixo wam, ubuso bakhe xa umbingeleli (okanye nantoni na) embiza ngexesha lenkonzo. Yenzani doodles!

Ndikhumbula / andinakulinda ijele!Ixesha lomboniso

Makhe sithethe malunga nendlela eyayimbi ngayo loo ntetho. Kwaqala nge-anecdote yehlabathi jikelele malunga nokuloba echibini, emva koko wabiza udadewabo a) ukuba nolwalamano olungcono notata wabo kuba wayeloluhlobo lwakhe kwaye b) eshiya usapho. (Okanye into?) Emva koko iphela nge-Solloway shrug yeklasikhi yokunyaniseka, bendingamazi nyani utata wam. Kay, byeeeee!

Jonga, anditsho ukuba iintetho zomngcwabo zilula, kodwa uNowa ujongeka ngathi wazisiwe ukuba utata wakhe usweleke kwenye indawo ngexesha lenkonzo.

Kananjalo, ingoma ayithandayo utata kaNowa awayeyicelile emngcwabeni wakhe yayindikhupha kumdlalo webhola. Isikhumbuzo esiqinileyo sokuba iinkqubo zeXesha lokubonisa azichithi mali kumalungelo e-albhamu yeRadiohead (kuba ingoma isimahla ukuyisebenzisa phantsi kweNdawo yoLuntu .)

Sikwafumanisa ukuba iyiminyaka emithathu uNowa wayichitha entolongweni, kwaye kwiinyanga ezintathu oko ephumile. Oko kungachazi ukuba kutheni bonke abantwana bakhe besengaphambi kokushicilela. (Kwaye, kubonakala ngathi baninzi ngoku?) UHelen usenomnxano kuye, ngakumbi kuba uNowa waya entolongweni ngenxa yakhe (hawt), kodwa uyamlahla kwindawo epholileyo andazi, ndiyaqikelela mhlawumbi Ngenye imini ndiza kujika ndithethe nabantwana bethu kwaye ndithathe umdla kubomi babo, kodwa okwangoku ndifuna ukuya kutya izihlunu ezikhulu kwaye ndikhwazwe ngumhlobo wosapho kufutshane ne-lasagna yovelwano. Puh-puh-uxolo!

Ewe, nonyana wakhe, uMartin, enezibilini ezichaphazelekileyo AKASEKHO NGOKU.

Nangona wayelungile, uMartin waqala lo mboniso njengesiqwenga somntu owayekuthanda ukuzikhohlisa ngokufa kwakhe, uHarold noMaude. Ke andazi ukuba singamsola kangakanani uNowa ngokuziphatha kakubi kukaMartin.

U-M wenzelwe 'Ukubulala wena, Tata !: Uluhlu olutsha lwexesha lobomiIxesha lomboniso

Njengobomi obumnandi njengoNjingalwazi Womp-Womp, akufuneki silibale ukuba uNowa usesekhona kwilizwe lamaphupha nelungelo lamadoda amhlophe, apho uvunyelwe khona ukuba ufundise iikholeji zekholeji yabasakhulayo (ekufuneka ingabikho semthethweni kuNowa, nokuba , kuba laa mfo uyakhasa) emva kokuchitha iminyaka emithathu kuphela entolongweni NGOKUBULALA NGENJONGO. (Kungenxa yokuba khumbula, ityala elalichasene noNowa yayingengokuba wayebaleka ngengozi ehle eScotty, yayikukuba wambulala ngenjongo, eyayiqiniswa libango lika-Oscar lokuba uNowa waqonda ukuba akangotata womntwana ka-Alison, kwaye ngempazamo wacinga uScotty, hayi uCole, ukuba abe ngoyena nobangela.)

Iinyanga ezintathu uphumile entolongweni, kwaye eli tyala ligwetyiweyo ngunjingalwazi. Ngubani ovumelekileyo ukuba aphephe naluphi na uhlobo loxanduva lwezezimali okanye lwabazali kwaye ahlekise ngokuphandle ngabafundi bakhe ngeprose yabo ebukhali, ebonisa indlela ubomi babo bangaphakathi obungebubo kwaphela. Utsho umfana onayo ngokwe-PTSD malunga ne-dudes kwiminqwazi yelori.

Owu? Utata kaNowa wamshiya indlu ngentando yakhe, nangona yayingudade wabo, uRita, ochithe iminyaka yakhe yokugqibela emgcina. Akukho biggie! Esinye nje isipho esivela emazulwini kuMnu Mock Fart. (Ngaphandle kokuthetha nantoni na yemali esinokuyicinga ukuba uNowa uyayifumana kwintengiso yakhe yeencwadi, ezazisele zisenza izigebenga ngaphambi kokuba umbhali wazo agwetywe kwityala lokubulala.)

Ndixolele, kodwa ngaba singacinga ukuba ubomi bukaNowa Solloway, nokuba bobona bumnyama amaxesha akhe, a amaxesha aphuculwe ngcono kuneyona mihla yam intle? Ukuba nje bendinokukhulisa iindevu….

Kodwa linda! Isiqingatha sesibini sesi siqendu siveza ukuba uNowa akalilo nenxalenye yenkunkuma enelungelo lokuba ngumfana kwi-MFA yakho njengoko wayevela. Intolongo imtshintshile! Sibona kwi-flashback ukuba ekuqaleni, wayekuthanda nokuba sejele, ekubonakala ukuba akufani kakhulu nokubuyela umva kombhali? (Oy jesus, this guy.) Kodwa after eviscer one of his student's for her diary entry paper and then randomly wake up in the professor of French intetho on Merlin (ngubani ngokucacileyo owayengumlingisi ophambili kuStephen King's Isiqingatha esimnyama, ngubani owayesazi?) , siyabona ukuba ubuqili bukaNowa, kunye nomqhubi wenqwelo-mafutha uzithiyile elele emva kwayo yonke imithi – kwaye ngokoqobo, njengaye WONKE umthi – ubotshelelwe ngandlela ithile kumava awayenawo nomlindi xa wayevalelwe.

Ngaba oku kunomdla? Andazi. Inyani yokuba kwelinye icala, uNowa unokuyicekisa into yokuba abafundi bakhe bahlanganisane kwiindawo ezikhuselekileyo, kwaye kwelinye, banqwenela ukuphulukana nenqanaba labo elikhuselweyo njengombhali onamandla oyindoda emhlophe, kubonakala ngathi ichukumisa into ebaluleke ngakumbi umboniso ukhe wasebenza ngaphambili.

Inqaku elisecaleni: NDIYAvuya kakhulu ukuba andisekho kholeji kwaye, ngayo nayiphi na ithamsanqa, ngekhe ndiye kwitheko lesidlo sangokuhlwa apho bakhoyo abafundi abakwiminyaka yobudala beekholeji. Uboya.

Icandelo II: UVinnie

Okokuqala konke: Ngokuqinisekileyo AKUKHO Rutgers. URutgers akayunivesithi edumileyo, ngaphandle kokuba ulibala ixesha lethu Umqeqeshi webhasikidi wayejula iibhola kubadlali , Kwaye unjingalwazi wethu woNcwadi woPhakathi wamaFrentshi akazange aququzelele amatheko esidlo sangokuhlwa njengoko wasithengisela ukhula emva kweeTraki zamafutha.

Okwesibini kuko konke: Ingcwele yeendevu ngeSolloway , Drew, Umcimbi ndivele nje ukusuka ku-zero ukuya ekuphazamiseni ukubulala umqala emva kwexesha elingephi kunokuba kubonakala ngathi kuthatha isigwebo sokubulala ukufumana isigxina sokuBhala ngokuBhala ePrinceton (TCNJ? Ayinamsebenzi). Lo asinguye mdala wethu Imicimbi , apho uNowa Solloway wayetyibilika kwiipelisi zebhanana kwaye wawela kwintombi yakhe ngexesha lenkanyamba yamatheko esini eshushu. Oku kukuthi, kakhulu njengoBrendan Fraser, uloyiko oloyikisayo ngakumbi lwento eyayisakuba mnandi kuye.

Njengesixhobo sokulwa, kwaye ngenxa yokuba ubuchopho bam bemileniyali buxhonywe ngokupheleleyo ziimbotyi zejeli kunye nethiyori yabalandeli endiyifunde kwiReddit, ndiza kusibuyisela esi siqendu phantsi kokucinga ukuba ixesha lesithathu Umcimbi usebenzisa i-EXACT efanayo iyelenqe lokujija njenge Mnu Robot isizini 2. Injalo loo nto, uNowa Solloway usesentolongweni, kwaye yonke into esiyibonayo itshintshiwe yingqondo yakhe yokungcungcutheka, nokwaphuka.

Ndiyathetha, ukuba ucinga ngayo ngendlela enzima kakhulu- kwaye ungayihoyi indlela inkqubo yobulungisa kulwaphulo-mthetho esebenza ngayo kulo naliphi na inqanaba – yona phantse iyavakala . Ndibona ngoluhlobo: UNowa wakhululwa ejele usuku, usuku nje olunye, ukuya kumngcwabo kayise. Wayecinga, ngokuchanekileyo, ukuba akazukuvunyelwa ukuba athethe kulo msitho-usengusisigebenga, emva kwayo yonke loo nto- yiyo loo nto imbeko yakhe yayingathandeki, yoyikeka, kwaye ethembele kakhulu ekubonakaliseni udade wabo uhlobo lukatata wakhe. Yeyiphi eyona gross, kodwa intolongo iyayitshintsha indoda.

Jonga incoko kaNowa noHelen. Kuthekani ngathi? Kubuza uHelen.

Intoni malunga thina? UNowa uyaphendula, kubonakala ngathi unegazi elibandayo, kodwa iyavakala ngakumbi xa uqaphela ukuba uNowa udidekile ngokwenene. Intoni malunga thina? yile nto wayithethayo uNowa, kodwa into awayeyithetha ngokucacileyo nguHelen, ndisejele.

Ngosuku olulandelayo, emva kokuba usibali kaNowa eqhushumbe xa efumanisa ukuba uNowa wanikwa indlu kwintando kayise (ngokufanelekileyo ke… ingaba uNowa uyifunela ntoni indlu? Usesejele ), ibuyele kwiNdlu eNkulu kaNowa, apho afundisa khona iklasi yokuBhala yokuDala kwamanye amabanjwa ( Eyona nto iyinyani ). Qaphela okona mzuzu u-Audrey eqala ukukhala njengoko uNowa egxeka ibali lakhe. Kulungile emva kokuba ethe, Kungcono, shiya ikhampasi. Kodwa AKANAKUYEKA ukuphuma ekhampasini. Kuba ikhampasi isentolongweni.

Indoda eyimfihlakalo, enxibe iminqwazi uNowa eqhubeka nokubona esikolweni? Ayimangalisi kangako! Akayiyo i-hallucination, nokuba, ungumgcini-ntolongo nje ohambahamba esenza umsebenzi wakhe. (Ithiyori yam ixhaswa yinto yokuba unogada wentolongo edlalwa nguBrendan Fraser, esaziyo sonke ukuba uvalelwe ukususela ngo-2008 ngolwaphulo-mthetho Umama: Ingcwaba loMlawuli weDragoni. Kwaye, eso sitayile somnqwazi siqinisekile sijongeka siqhelekile:

Kwakhona jonga kwitheko lesidlo sangokuhlwa, isimanga esothusayo , yayizinyaswe ngabantu abafanayo kwiklasi yokuBhala yokuBhala kaNowa. Jonga okwesibini kule ncoko ye-loooooong, eyayigcwele izimvo ezithile ezimbi. Yonke le ntetho yemvume iyadodobalisa yinto engathethiyo isidima sobugcisa kwiikholeji zobugcisa, ewe, kodwa KUKHO into umntu anokuyithetha ukuba ngoku basejele ngenxa yokuhlaselwa ngokwesondo.

Okokugqibela, nikela ingqalelo ENGAKUMBI kwinto ayithethayo uJuliette kuNowa, phezulu kwigumbi lakhe lokulala, xa ethetha ngombhali ongumFrentshi owabhala umsebenzi wakhe omkhulu ngelixa wayevalelwe. Uthi, Unenkampani elungileyo.

Ke, ndithatha yonke into, yonke into endisandula ukuyibhala kunye nendawo apho uNowa axelela uHelen ukuba ukuvalelwa ngokusisiseko kufana nokubuyela kwindawo yombhali, kwaye iziphumo zezam zamva Random, Outlandish Umcimbi Ithiyori yeveki: UNowa usentolongweni, usebenza kwincwadi yakhe elandelayo-I-Autobiografi kaJack Hunter- nayo yonke into esiyibonayo iyamlinganisa kwaye ahlanganise amava ukuze ancede agqibe umsebenzi. Ndiyathetha, xa uNowa wagqiba umsebenzi wobugcisa wokuqala, Inzala , ebe ubambekile kwinkqubo ekruqulayo yasemva kwesikolo njengesohlwayo sokulala ngesondo kwigumbi lokufundela , ke khawufane ucinge ukuba inokuba nkulu kangakanani le ncwadi.

Ngokuphathelene naloo mboniso wokugqibela – endifanele ukuba ndibonise ukuba wawukhanyisiwe kwaye u-claustrophobic njengokubuyela emva kukaNowa entolongweni- ndicinga ukuba ingcaciso icacile… intambo yasentolongweni. Ndiyathetha, yiza. Kufuneka ube yintolongo. Ukuba ubunokuchitha isigwebo sakho nakuphi na ukusondela kuNowa Solloway, NGABA ubungayi kumbetha ngebrashi yamazinyo ebukhali?

Ngoku, ukuba kukho umntu ofuna mna, ndiza kuzifihla apha kuthi IWestworld uyabuya, kuba loo mboniso ukwanegazi kwaye uxinzelelo kodwa wonke umntu uyirobhothi ke ilungile. Ngokwenyani, ayiyongxaki leyo Imicimbi ithiyori…